Boz, I hear yoiu as I am not keen on AA, and have gone down the same route as you seem to be on at the moment...but the only person it effects is you...what I did was to stop going to AA, full stop....I hear it works for people that want it and I had to become big enought to accept that...it has its good points also, its just not for me.....have yoiu had a painful experience with AA??? that does take a while to get over, especially when you entrusted it with so much, only to feel let down by it, that hurts...good luck with whatever you are doing.