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greensky said:
i'm going crazy here! my son's been on meds for 3 yrs now and continues to suffer. it breaks my heart. he's almost 6and is struggling in school and at home. any imput is appreciated.

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What sort of specific behaviors is he doing that are problematic?
In what manner is he struggling in school?

I apologize ahead of time if my comments below are offensive or invalidating in any way, because it isn't my intention to invalidate you or be offensive. I really just like solving problems.

I should preface by saying that it's extremely difficult to tell if a toddler or a pre-schooler has ADHD, and often what seems like ADHD behaviors at that age won't be there when they are 7 or 8... The diagnostic criteria for ADHD (in the DSM-IV-TR)state that they MUST exhibit the the qualifying ADHD criteria in TWO OR MORE SETTINGS, and most of the time, toddlers aren't in other settings long enough to be observed as having ADHD behaviors. Even if they are, they usually aren't being observed by professionals trained at recognizing ADHD in children.

I don't think one, two, or even three visits with a psychiatrist or pediatrician is enough time to tell. Even with kids as old as 10, their behavior might appear completely normal while in the controlled environment of the pediatrician or child psychiatrist's office.
That's not to say that some doctors aren't exceptionally good at diagnosing pre-schoolers though, but I'd question the accuracy of the diagnosis if three years of medication isn't helping.

There are a lot of overt behaviors that look like hyperactive/impulsive ADHD, but are either just normal, or actually something else. Conduct Disorder can seem like ADHD too, or it might occur together with the ADHD.
Sometimes the environment just needs to be modified a little bit. This might be something as simple as changing a certain parental technique or response, or changing bedtimes, or napping more frequently, etc. I don't know if that is the case with you or not though, I'm just spitting out ideas from what I read about childhood ADHD.

My best suggestion would be to get your son re-assessed for ADHD with a child psychologist. I say child PSYCHOLOGIST because they are usually better trained in diagnosing ADHD than child psychiatrists are.

I would also recommend a book for you called "Delivered From Distraction" by psychiatrist and a leading expert in ADHD--Dr. Ned Hallowell. It is also co-authored by Dr. John Ratey. Read as much as you can about ADHD, because it really helps in understanding and dealing with the frustrations and sometimes even--heartache, of ADHD.

It's really difficult to see our children suffer, and feeling helpless to change it. Just remember that you ARE NOT HELPLESS; you can get a grip on this, and don't ever quit or give up! I think getting your son re-assessed with a child psychologist is an excellent way of pro-actively dealing with a problem before he gets older and it affects him (and you) to a greater degree. Read the book I recommended--it's really good and isn't written like a boring medical textbook.

I really wish you good luck, and come back and tell us how it goes!