I know I have certain things I do when I'm angry, or ashamed, or hurt. I know that in many therapy circumstances I have a decided head tilt with my ear towards my right shoulder. I think he reads that correctly as a sign that everything's ok between us. Or that when I get angry, I look sharply to the right. Or when I'm ashamed, I look down. Or that when I feel overwhelmed my eyelids droop sleepily. I can't say that I communicate with him on purpose this way. In fact, sometimes I wish I had an override button, because I'd rather keep things more hidden. But I find myself doing them anyway.

But he's got his own "tells". One of my favorites is that when he realizes he's feeling irritated or upset or uncomfortable, he puts himself in an extremely relaxed position. Far more relaxed than when he actually feels relaxed. He also has that skin tone that flushes easily. He fidgets when he feels sleepy. And I swear, although he disagrees, that when he's feeling extreme emotion, he drawls. And those are just the ones I can describe.

I think maybe they have a general knowledge of mannerisms frequently used. But then they have to figure out how they apply to a specific client. For the first long while in therapy he was constantly interpreting my body language to mean something other than what I was actually feeling. But now he knows me much better. He no longer thinks that if I cross my arms, I'm feeling protective. He knows I just tend to cross my arms, and whether it means more than that depends a lot on context.