{{{{{{{LMo}}}}}}}}}

Are we chasing each other here LOL I just go to reply and boom there you are

Thank you for the compliment I am glad you weren't offended.

I think it bothers me when I feel like someone is being taken advantage of and that person is you. I am not judging your bf at all but it just seems like he is at a place where he is comfortable.

About the control comments I made.....

Financial - To change this hun...you need to change your way of thinking.....you need someone more of an equal to you for this to balance out. Is it your bf? That is hard to say...would it balance if he was working? probably... but only you can answer that. However, your answer may help with your decision that i think you need to make.

Emotional - He is relying on you emotionally to hold his hand with the job hunting aspect. That to me is control you have over him. I am also getting the impression that people in his life have always made decisions for him? That is emotional control too....not in a bad way but in a way that is not helpful for him. These are things that he can deal with himself through therapy....it is not up to you to fix.

To make changes there, again, you need to change your way of thinking. You are one strong woman and I know that you have it in you to draw on that strength and literally put your foot down.

When my bf and I started living together...I was just like you....he wasn't working and then we had our son ...he wanted to stay home and look after him as I had to return to work. This drove me crazy beserk as you call it . What changed? He started his own business...I helped him when he asked for help...business planning etc and the most important thing? I kept my nose out of it It has helped our relationship immensely We now have a balance that was never there before and it was a struggle. I gave him the ultimatum or the good swift kick in the butt and it worked.

Like I said earlier...you can only change you.


Heather

"The Pessimist complains about the wind, the Optimist expects it to change and the REALIST adjusts his sails." ~~~author unknown