Ugh, that sounds like a very hard session.

I guess I have some mixed feelings about needs. I think that maybe we all have needs that no human being can meet. That's why we have lots of human beings in our lives. I suspect we all have deep wells of need inside. And that we can get some met one place, and some met another place, and hopefully eventually we can get enough of them met to bring the need to a manageable level.

But then there are the specific needs we have from specific people. And sometimes they just can't meet them either. Or don't want to. Or have their own needs that might clash with ours. My therapist complains in some irritation sometimes that I need guarantees from him, and he just can't give me guarantees. He says I want certainty, when there is no certainty. He's right, of course. It's possible that other therapists could give me a bit more certainty than he can, but likely none could fill my bottomless need for certainty. So we compromise. I recognize that he can't give me the certainty I need. And he recognizes that I need him to give me as much certainty as he can.

It isn't bad to need. It isn't bad to ask. Sometimes the answer is no. But that doesn't make you bad for asking, or for needing. It doesn't make your therapist bad for not being able to say yes. There's nothing for you to be ashamed of.

It does hurt though. Ouch. I can remember lots of hurts myself.

In the end, can he meet enough of your needs to make your relationship worthwhile to you?