angel girl.... we hear your cries for help...
you need to just check yourself into the hospital.
you need to hear your own cry for help, because if you feel like youre talking to yourself .... then its a very accurate statement, ... you are trying to subconsiously or consiously tell YOURSELF to do whatever it takes to survive this.
this cannot be your last plead for life, because we all want you here, and YOU even want to be here.

please find the strength inside to go to a hospital and stay there for a while until they get your meds examined.
if you cant do that for whatever reason, just go somewhere you will be safe... like a police station, etc....
stick around, you have lots left to do here.