I wanted to first say thank you for all the kind words and thoughts that you have offered to me. Deciding on whether or not to conceive due to my bipolar disorder has been one of the most difficult decisions in my life. I have worried and analyzed every detail. How would I react to going off my medication? Would there be a any chance of birth defects due to the medication that I have already taken over the years? Would I have manic episodes while being pregnant? Will I be depressed? I could not fathom the thought of post partum depression; I would not hurt my baby, could I? My medication works great right now as it is, would I be able to pick up where I left off after I deliver? The questions I agonized over went on and on and on.

Each of you that replied to my plea shed a new ray of hope on the situation for my husband and me. You pointed out the positives and the negatives but most importantly you made me see the POSSIBILITY. Yes, I can conceive, carry, deliver and raise my own child. My bipolar disorder should not deter us from the one thing in this life that we so desperately desire- a child that has Seans wit and charm, my tenacity and optimism and both of our zests for life!

Thank you for throwing me the rope and pulling me back to shore. We all need rescuing from this illness from time to time. Just when I think I have it in check, almost controlled, it consumes me again and begins tossing my life in yet another perfect storm. It is a battle we all must face over and over again.

On Monday, I see my doctors (psych and dietician) to begin coming off my medication in order for preparation to conceive! Then on Tuesday, my husband and I meet with our OB for our consult to review our plan for conception, and to also discuss our plan after we are pregnant. I am VERY fortunate that all of these doctors are located at the same hospital so they all will be linked together to monitor my care throughout each step of this adventure.

I am not quite sure if we would have made this decision if I had not received the valuable insight here on the forum from you extremely passionate, intelligent caring people. Please know that you all are in my thoughts and prayers. Thanks again for everything and stay in touch.

Warmest regards,

Jessica

quote]eccentricmind76 said:
Good morning to anyone who happens to stumble upon my post. I visit the forum often but I am not much of a poster, I do have a blog on Live Journal and use psych central as one of my main references in coping with my illness but I thought it was time to come to the forum and seek some advice with a very important subject in my life.

I guess I should offer a little background on myself since I am not a familiar poster to you guys…I am 31 years old and was properly diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder a little over a year a go. My doctors believe that it had gone undiagnosed for over ten years. I have had quite a battle in my life time and it was a victory to final have some answers to why my life had been so challenging. I took about six months and several cocktails of medications to finally settle on what was going to work for me. I am happy to report that I feel great, I have a stable job, my marriage is better than it ever has been and for once in my life I am looking forward to the future.

One area of my future is children, or at least one child. My husband and I have talked about it with our marriage counselor and I have talked about it separately with my own doctors. We initially came to the conclusive that it may be best for us to adopt because of my Bipolar Disorder. We both hated the thought of me going back to square one and having to feel the way I used to feel without taking my medication. Also, what if I experienced mania or a severe depression episode while I was pregnant? Now, one of my doctors said she has had patients who are completely stable while they are pregnant, something to do with the extra hormones in their system. Then another doctor told me that pregnancy can trigger episodes. I feel so confused!

So, back to the adoption route: We began looking at the different adoption agencies, the costs, the home study steps. Then it hit me, would they let me adopt a baby? Or even an older child? I mean I have a mental illness. My doctors are even giving me mixed answers on that question. Some say we would not have a problem and others say that my mental illness may not allow for adoption.

Can anyone offer any insight on this for me? My husband and I are terrified and confused on what to do regarding our future for a family. Has anyone been through this? If so, what did you do? Did you adopt? Was it difficult to get approval? Did you decide to conceive on your own? How did it affect your Bipolar Disorder? Many thanks and God Bless to anyone who would be so kind to offer some advice and insight to me.

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