darkspiral;
Hi and welcome to PC. I am of Native American descent too. Alcoholism is a disease that is pretty rampant in the Native culture. For some reason we are intolerant of alcohol. This disease will only get progressivly worse over time.

My brother is very much like your husband. He has gone to counseling and rehab many many times only to be back on the bottle in a relitivly short time. He has worn out his welcome with many in our family. Currently he has been sober fo the last 4 months after another stint in the rehab.

Have you ever checked out Alanon? They are a good resource and provide support as well as advice. Your husband has an issue with anger and it comes out while drinking and his way of dealing with it is to blame others, hence his blaming "whites". That is part of the disease, deflection of the real issue onto others and justifying his actions by saying he can't remember.

I truly hope you get some help and support for you and learn just what a horrible disease you are dealing with.

Be safe,
Eric