Wow, I am so grateful for T today.

I've been sick for 8 days with SOMETHING. Thought it was a urinary tract infection, then thought maybe a yeast infection, then maybe both....anyhow, it's been going on and on and getting worse and worse. I really, REALLY hate going to the doctor, so I've been trying everything I can think of at home.

Then something came up a couple of days ago that made me realize it might be something much more serious than the things I had been suspecting. And I KNEW I had to go to the doctor, but it's been making me panicky, on top of not feeling well. The doctor I like isn't available until next week, so I had to make an appointment with a doctor in the practice I don't like and in fact, find kind of scary.

Anyhow, I went to T on Monday with a fever, and just curled up on his couch with a blanket and a pillow and had my session. We had such a nice session, and I totally felt cared for by him. I told him I just wanted to sleep, and he told me he would watch over me. (I didn't sleep!)

Since then, we've e-mailed back and forth a couple of times a day about the fear of the doctor, and the scarier possibility with the illness, and he's been so helpful and supportive, helping me get through it, and offering to talk on the phone whenever that would be more helpful.

Today, he left a phone message on my cell phone for me to listen to as I drove to the doctor. It was so soothing and helpful. He was like "as you get closer to the doctor's, remember....", and "as you're getting nearer, remember...." - it was like having him along on the drive. He said on the phone message that he would check his messages between his 3:00 and 4:00 clients (my appt was at 3) and would call me back if I left a message that I was out of the doctor. I left a message and he called me back and we talked about the outcome of the appointment, how I was feeling, what they tested for, what meds I have, etc.

It felt so good to have someone looking after me. I certainly never had that growing up, and while my husband has many strong suits, taking care of me is most definitely NOT one of them. It feels like a gift to have this right now. It IS a gift.

Of course, no one IRL would understand how much this means to me at all, so I just wanted to share with people I knew would understand. Thanks for letting me babble along in my feverish state!