sorry to hear that aries... ok, i can accept that some things might never change, i had to when mom got crippled and i knew she wouldnt ever heal all the way... i had to accept that... it is an awful experience for her and all the family.... but......... instead of letting it crush my spirit forever, i have resisted a sad fate of feeling like i'd lost the game... i kept digging deeper into the tragedy to find a greater lesson... there are many....

mom showed me what true grit is.... she never let her handicap keep her down, no matter what... i rarely see her cry and she could use some healing tears.... but she is a survivor...

maybe theres some deeper lesson for you in all this.... i would never say you dont try or that you dont try hard enough.... but for me, sometimes the lesson was endurance and a test of my will.... i think you have the right attitude aries, you try so hard to see the good... let yourself feel what you are able to in as many good ways as you can... for me, sometimes i had to accept that maybe this is as good as it gets and i began to appreciate small, but good things around me... i think it had an accumulative good effect on my over all mood...

i dont mean to give any quick easy answers... try to keep that handbag of remedies within reach... write some affirmations.. repeat to yourself what a good thing it is you are doing for yourself and others by trying as hard as you do.. i wish none of us ever had to suffer while we do this work on healing ourselves... maybe we can rest in knowing that even tho it hurts, its taking us to a better place and we will eventually get there....

best to you aways