This didn't warrent a new thread, but i am just so sad lately. I just need to spill all the pain out. I hate when i can't even concentrate on my work b/c there is so much stressing me inside. I just zone out on the internet, tv, or just laying in bed.
I feel like i have no one.
I feel like there is no one to support me, and that makes me feel sad.
I even have resorted to deluding myself that something is wrong with my email, so that I won't feel bad that my pastors have not emailed me back.
But inside, there is still the sinking feeling. I want a hug. I want a phone call. I want numerous calls to check up on me. I want someone who cares so badly. Even my therapist.... I feel like quiting therapy. I really think im going to. Its too hard to do long distance. I am so frustrated and sad about the lack of support. And it all falls on me as i wonder, why doesnt anyone ever care? Why do i never mean anything to anyone? I've just got a huge hurt inside and i can't tell anyone i know because i don't trust anyone. No one is true and honestly inside i hate them because of it. (yes.. i will have to do the forgiveness thing sometime) I'm just tired of hoping in people. I'm tired of being abandoned and rejected. I'm tired of people's apathy and being ignored. And i see that same sad face that i see in my mirror in the face of my brother. My heart hurts.