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I dunno it feels like I must be lying, it cant be true, dont be silly this is me

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I get upset when my T says something about my symptoms or experiences being common for someone who was abused. Even after all this T and accepting my PTSD diagnosis, I have a hard time calling what happened "abuse." Just hearing it makes me feel like I'm watching a TV movie or something.

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she smiled for a while and said, I dont foresee that ever happening we have a good relationship

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This made me smile! I'm glad you had such a positive session with her, that you guys found a way to arrange sessions so that you get the support you need before and after her vacation. And I'm glad you felt so good hearing that she thinks the relationship is a good one.

I also have the same outward stony reaction when I hear positive things from my T. I think we do it to protect ourselves. But it's wonderful to read that you value the relationship so much.