(((((((((((((freewill))))))))))))))))

You can "forgive" at your own pace. Your minister may be doing the "religious" thing and instructing you that you're obligated to forgive... but it's up to you, on your own time. Nobody should tell you what to do.

I also disagree, that dwelling on the past can be useful sometimes - we learn from it, heal from it and then hopefully move on. Being stuck in the past isn't good, but staying there for a while isn't a bad thing.