Severe and constant childhood abuse and neglect is a severe trauma that isn't likely to resolve or go away without a lot of work and good treatment. You can recover and reclaim your life, but it won't just happen. And you do deserve to recover from this.
Your depression is understandable, and makes sense given your trauma history. Do the people you are with now know about how your stepmother treated you?
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“We should always pray for help, but we should always listen for inspiration and impression to proceed in ways different from those we may have thought of.”
– John H. Groberg
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