Yes, it is very hard to share. Especially when afterwards you realize humiliating yourself by telling someone a few of the nastiest things you've done, yields nothing. I don't know what I was looking for. Being able to confess to some one you were a sick perverted punk does nothing but make you feel worse. In all honesty, I likely dished out just as much (if not more) other kinds of abuse than I received. I should be unhappy. I don't need to go to therapy anymore to understand why. Hearing different reasons and excuses doesn't change anything.