cibomatto, when I have lost people close to me, it took time for the news to really hit me. I made it through their funerals and such with only a few tears. But, in time, when I started to really think about them, the sadness and other feelings came to me. Don't rush yourself or think that you are doing something wrong. There is nothing wrong with you. For me, the feelings came a little at a time. Here and there when I was least expecting them. Really, I think it was my mind's way of protecting myself--I could not deal with the loss all at once, I had to do it little by little. I am sorry for your loss.