"Sorry everyone, I am usually a positive well at least I try to be, but I just can't do it anymore. I just want to give up. No hospitals, meds, therapy appts. NO MORE! I can't take it anymore."

it seems to me that you have already put too much of a load onto yourself. you are overwhelmed by your recover while frustrated at the fact that you are not recovering too soon....
well, how soon is soon enough? Recovery is just a process ....its not a duty to cover too urgently though hurried we might be. Just take it slowly. The people around you wont get down if you dont recover at once.Give it time.

take care.