Thanks for the messages of support ladies and gents.

Unfortunately she is convinced she is on top of the world and has never been more clear about what she wants ( which isn't me).
Hopefully I can get the consenses and support of a few of the people she is still listening to when they read the info i have collected and we can talk her into seeing the doctor.
Our relate counceller has just started hitting the nail on the head in that my wife seems to be superimposing problems from her past onto our realationship and finding problems that weren't there or blowing very minor things into huge ones by changing the past.

Cheers