Hello, im new and ive been reading some of the posts and no one seems to be like me.. Somebody help!! Im not sure of whats wrong with me. The thing is: I hate my boobs (i want to be a boy) and the only thing i could think of to reduce them was to be very thin, i made it and now i weight about 30 kg. Im 18 and i managed to hide the anorexia from my family and i was able to even fool the doctor and medical tests. Im really happy being this thin, but recently i've been overeating (this hurts so bad) cause im scared of getting caught. Im searching for help now cause later it will be harder to get over, but i cant tell nobody (specially my mom). My mind is not that estable, and suicidal thoughts are always here!! i would love to kill mysel but i dont have a gun. Im stuck cause i dont want to be healthy, but i dont want to stay this way (the binge crisis and all..) Can somebody give me tips to gradually stop the overeating thing??