(((((((((((((multipixie9))))))))))
We're glad you're here.

A dear friend of mine once suggested this to me and when I allow myself to do it, it helps immensely. Maybe you can make a set time, evening, morning, whenever is best for you. Get out your coloring books and crayons, markers, paint, makeup, dollies, puzzles, favorite snacks- whatever you think young ones like in general (I found that I had these things without having to go out and get them just due to the nature of the beast). If you don't have any of that stuff, perhaps you can make a quick trip out?

Maybe you can just allow yourself the whole evening. Even though I have no inside communication that I'm aware of, what I had to do was be willing not to get upset if I lost the whole evening. For me, the truth is that I lose whole evenings/mornings/days a lot of the time anyway. Those things were getting used, pictures were being colored, puzzles done. The problem was that the more I was becoming aware of it, the more upset I was getting and the more upset I get, the more easily triggered I get, the more switching I do, etc.

I have found that when I have "scheduled" time where I tell myself that it's okay if these things happen, my brain is more apt to be calmer in the other times. When I am calmer, I am less triggered and it really seems to help me overall.

Maybe you can use this time while husband is gone to try this? And keep telling self that the support is not gone, just a little further away at the moment. And he's coming back. Please keep us posted as to how everything works out.

As for the other part of your post, definitely. We want to support you here and if there is anything we can do to help, please ask. I'm so glad you feel safe enough to post this. Please keep posting. We care about you and are glad you're here.