thank you for all replies ..
i did find a dr that treats neurological stuff and does testing .. also therapy .. all in one .. i have a appointment soon.
something tells me that i do have neuro problems on top of everything else.. i dont know how they test but wil soon.
kinda scared at this point.
it will mean a change of MSW to a Phd LP .. a transition.
which is probably what i needed all along.
it is good and i am glad i found someone .. just scared at the same time.