i've come to the conclusion that i binge because i hate myself.

i dont like anything about myself when i feel down, and i just want to destroy myself.

when i feel like a gross pig, thats when i decide that i'll kill myself if my stomache doesnt shrink back down-that's when i purge.

honestly, i hate muscle at the moment. i weigh more bc of muscle. my scale says FAT. i hate myself. i hate myself. i hate myself. practically overweight.

shoot me. sorry for the rant. just so upset i dont want to live right now