Pinky, you and i discussed this at length in chat - fab convo i might add, open, direct and interesting i thought. i have always appreciated your openness to well thought out points of view. So, i'm not going into it here as well. But this caught my eye
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your false belief that sexual feelings pave the way to intimacy

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i have never ever heard you say that you have such a belief.. at least not in the way this seems to imply. What i have gotten from what you have said is that you feel that the pathway to intimacy may include feelings that we experience as sexual... and that the appearance of sexual feelings should be faced, and not suppressed, ignored or rejected.. that the appearance of erotic transference is often a cue, and some say necessary but i cannot speak for you there, that there is a deepening intimacy.

i dont think that says the same thing as "paving the way" for intimacy.

judging someone else's beliefs as false seems a fair bit narcissistic in itself imo.