dear MyFocus,
I completely understand your ambivalence. It sounds like you know the best thing to do for your health and even the consequences of not doing it..... but it is so hard to give up the comfort and familiarity of the ED. I am in a similar siutation right now. I need to reach out for help as well-- but I don't want to yet. I keep saying to myself - just a few more weeks and a few more pounds, and then I will stop.

The situation with your therapist sounds so painful - and even scary because I don't understand how something like that could happen. Is there anyway you could find a therapist not associated with that clinic? It will take a lot of courage for you to move on from this in a healthy way. The more you allow yourself to sink back into it.... the harder it will be to climb out of it.

take care of yourself,
kt