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radio_flyer said:

But then how would I find it "within" myself, when I don't even remember any interactions with parents, sister and brother when growing up. I don't know how I was raised. I was the "perfect" child, so maybe life was just going along smooth, and that is why I don't remember. But then that idea doesn't agree with what was uncovered in therapy. I don't know why I can't blend what I remember as being "a great childhood" with what surfaced in therapy. I think maybe I think too much, sometimes.

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It's a survival mechanism to "remember" childhood as being happy and normal. It seems like you might have had a "role" in your family as being the perfect child. Roles develop in alcoholic and dysfunctional families.