Thankyou Colleen. You dont know how much it means for me for you to take your time to listen to me rant and reply

I hope tomorrow is a better day. But I have so much mess to clean up from today. Who knows what will happen.

I still want to keep my 11 week streak of not SI'ing. I know I nearly went tonight, but 11 week is the best Ive ever done. I cant give it up now. Im not in the frame of mind yet where I can honestly say to myself 'Im not going to SI because I dont deserve to be hurt etc etc'. Im not doing it because i cant really think straight, and I know that if I give in now, i will risk alot of important things. but its a start.

thanks for listening, Im feeling a bit calmer now

babyg xXx