Hi Purple, how did your appt go? I don't think that you are responsible for how you go to where you are. We develop as children and our parents are responsible for our environment then. Once we are adults, however, we do have to take responsibility in order to heal. I don't think that you have to shut up and go away, though! As we take the road of healing we certainly can and do make mistakes. Mistakes are okay. Everyone makes them.