> Which problems with your T are you specifically talking about?

I guess what he does reminds me of one thing my mother used to do -- and when I am feeling more incapacitated it just about destroys therapy. That is, he talks too much. Just about everything I say he has a rejoinder for. He has a very hard time keeping quiet and listening to me. My thinking is often disjointed, and it takes a while, even when I am by myself and have hours to compose myself, to put my thoughts together and begin to have insights into what is going on. It is only when I am operating "well" that I have the ability to override his tendency to say something every time I say something, or have the ability to tell him that he needs to let me talk. And when I do, I do not think he really understands it, at least over the short term. It has not changed his behavior much. He has needs, I think, that override seeing my needs. And telling someone that is not a very good way of changing the situation. My mother, of course, found any suggestion of error on her part to be intolerable. For me when I was small (I guess I am not any more) it seemed life-threatening to challenge her in any way -- she thought she was being challenged/threatened even when she was not.

I actually am learning in spite of, and maybe because of, this problem. I learn to understand, I think, why he does what he does and why it has the effect on me that it does. I learn to work it out on my own. But in the bad times it is very frightening for me to have my mind stalled and he does not do anything to reassure me.

It is very interesting for me to discover how many people are not very aware of themselves and how they affect other people. I really would like to meet some people with a lot of self-awareness, but I don't. I AM finding it easier to cope with that, since (I think) my own self-awareness is increasing. It would be nice to have more people to share that with.