(hey, wasn't that a song or somethin?)

I'm really sick, like contagious-sick, though no one is sure with what yet. (The leading contenders are whooping cough and pneumonia.)

I'm also sick, metaphorically, of being ignored, but I don't know what to do about that, either.

Today about 5 miles from where I work and right next door to a place I like to shop, a guy shot up a church meeting, killed 7 people plus himself. I put these types of things into two categories. There are the people who are pissed off at the government and think murder will make their point (think McVeigh), and there are people who are so desperate for attention that they're willing to make the biggest splash they can think of to get it. That's where I see this guy. I'm starting to be able to relate.

It's definitely been "out of sight, out of mind" for me around here. I currently have 3 jobs and I don't get to post as much anymore, but I've discovered my value to people by the number who have checked on me to see where I've been (can count on one hand, with many fingers left over, is the answer to that one). My real life friends aren't returning phone calls or emails. I don't THINK I'd start a shoot-em-up just to get noticed, but I'm understanding the mindset of the people who do it. Loneliness sucks. Not being able to count on people you thought you could count on REALLY sucks.

What's a girl gotta do to get noticed?! A little human contact goes a long way.