I realized it was over after his third affair. In the past he convinced me and I convinced myself that we could work through anything. I was with him 21 years (17 married) and just couldnt let go and "give up". I am still sickened by the whole mess but finally realized that I deserve to be in a relationship where I am loved and respected as much as I love and respect him. I still love my ex very much but refuse to live any longer wondering who the next woman will be, when it will happen and so on. And my children have suffered enough through Mommy and Daddy separating and getting back together over and over. I just hope the hurt goes away one day so I can truely move on.