Hello!
I'd like someone to tell me if I have OCD or at least, what's wrong with me. I don't think I'm ready to go to a doctor.
I've noticed I'm a bit masochistic, I want to hurt myself and so.. but that's not my obsession-compulsion thing....:
Sometimes I'm thinking how easy it would be to kill someone, or make a suicide. I don't want to die anyway. But IF I'm standing on a bridge, IF I have scissors in my hand...how easy. The thing that stops me is that then I should go to jail.
Other things...stronger things in my head are counting words I read, write or hear. Sometimes it's terrible. The numbers can never be 2,4,6,8... I hate those numbers. So I have to think just a part of a sentence, where are 1,3,5,7... words.
I have to touch things in the right way... step, read a text in my mind in the right way and do it over and over if it doesn't work.
Sometimes I really feel someone's following me behind my back or is under my bed.
The things on the table are not allowed to be put to touch each other.
When I was younger I had to write some sentences/words so many times, perfectly, I think.
I don't know if you got this. Those things don't seem to take so long time of my day or then I just don't notice because I can do other things meanwhile. They don't seem to make my life harder but sometimes there are those situations and well, I'm a bit distressed or fiery.
I don't know where this belongs to but I hope somebody could tell me ... if I should know something, going to a doctor? Do you feel I have something mental...?
Thanks for your time, have a good day.