Tinna, I understand the anger you are going through. Although, my abuse was not sexual or at least as much as I remember at this point, I had lots of anger from the phyical and emotional abuse I dealt with from my father and his mother. Now I am just trying to put the pieces back together and figure out why. I went back home recently to ask my mother who claimed of having no knowledge of the abuse even though she was present during some of it, why she let it happen. Totally denial. Other relatives gave me a clearer picture of what was going on at the time of the abuse. So I am growing in awareness of the how, but since both my father and grandmother have died, the why of it will never truly be answered. But I as you, am working with a T, that hopefully will help my brain deal with what happened so that a true healing from the hurt of the past can take place. Best of luck to you. 1Girl