For one thing, I don't believe that you are the "evil" one. Your sister seems to have a problem with communication and more so with caring about you.

This man... I don't know... I've been on the internet for quite a few years and have had some experiences with people from online. I've met quite a few, but I can say that none of the ones I met were that forward and so interested in sex as this man seems to be.

I've also had some bad experiences online. This was while I was still in the "victim mode" and didn't realize I could just log off or go somewhere else if I didn't like what was going on.

How long have you known this man face to face? Does he know you're a rape victim? To me, it doesn't seem very "sweet" of him to want to buy you a sex toy or to suggest you use it when he's not around. He may be pushing you into a place you're not ready to go yet. It sounds to me that you are still suffering from the effects of the rape. Have you received counseling for it? If not, I strongly suggest you do that before you get sexually involved with ANYONE. You need to be comfortable with your own sexuality before you get sexually involved. It doesn't sound to me like you're comfortable with it.

My heart goes out to you. It feels like you and I may have some of the same feelings about ourselves. Please do be careful... be gentle with yourself... don't push yourself beyond what you're comfortable with at the time. It's really difficult to get out of the "victim mode" so work on that, ok?

Safe hugs if okay.