Kia ... Colleen wanted me to let you know she's safe for now. I am on the phone with her and will NOT get off until I know she can make it until tomorrow.

I am part of the problem. I got my hopes up that she would finally come HOME and get away from all her problems. Then she decided to stay. What she doesn't understand is that SHE did not CAUSE my disappointment ... I DID. I trusted her to be strong enough to hear the truth of MY unhappiness and she now thinks she's responsible for it.

She is no more responsible for MY disappointment than I am for her suffering today. I don't know how to tell her ... when I tried, she gave me the "Uh huh" answer. A NON-answer because she doesn't believe me.

How can I tell her that I want NOTHING MORE than HER happiness?

How do I tell her that her mother, the strong person she depends on, has bad days, too?

There is so much going on in my life right now that I became overwhelmed by it all. I was feeling pitiful. I wanted to get in the car with my dog and just drive away from my life.

Do you understand that this is NORMAL? That sometimes even the strongest people have weak days? That we share those weak times ONLY with the people we think are strong enough to hear them?

Someone ... please. Please beam me up and to Chicago! My baby needs me even though I'm the one who has driven her to this edge. I need to talk to her, but more, I need her to LISTEN. She IS stronger than she thinks. If I hadn't thought so, I would never have told her of my disappointment.

Someone ... please. PLEASE tell me what to DO! I love her more than my own life. It's how Good Mama's feel about their children. She needs to understand that even "normal" people have really rotten days. She has to believe that even "normal" people feel pitiful sometimes.

She has to KNOW she deserves better and is stronger than SI. Or worse.

Thanks, Kia. Thanks to all of you who are helping my baby today. Please stand by ... she wants you to know she'll be back online after she yells at all the idiot M-Fers on the highway!

Stacy ... sometimes a Good Mama