Dear JinnyAnn --

I teach communication, and it has been very helpful to me to know a little bit about the difference in the way that men and women express intimacy. Women express intimacy by talking and reveal their vulnerabilities and insecurities to the person to whom they wish to feel close.

Men express intimacy by doing things together, doing things for the other person, and "being there."

This means that a guy thinks he is expressing love when he gets the oil change in our car, mows the lawn, or brings home a paycheck. As one adult male in a class said, "I told you that I loved you when we got married. If I change my mind, I'll let you know."

I understand what you mean about craving the displays of affection -- I like that too.

Are you in therapy, JinnyAnn? Or in a support group? Do you think that might help?

I am so sorry that you are feeling so down.