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Griffe what matters is right now you're clean. And yes withdrawl sucks big time, but once it's over you start to feel so much better. I'd really encourage you to consider treatment - It helped me a great deal. Just try to take it one day at a time, and remember your reasons for wanting to be clean.
--splitimage
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"I danced in the morning when the world was begun. I danced in the moon and the stars and the sun". From my favourite hymn.
"If you see the wonder in a fairy tale, you can take the future even if you fail." Abba
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