Bringing personal conflict/upset/disagreement/dislike to the public forums is against the community guidelines for PC and not within its mission.

When we bring personal upsets to the public forums it can be upsetting in one to several ways...even when vague.

To post about another member in a critical or negative way is flaming. They can be left to feel hurt, upset and angered that they've been called to the public carpet or that others are seeking support for themselves but against them...feeling very unsupported.

Vague posting can be even more upsetting, and more widely damaging. Those who don't even have a thing to do with anything can feel extremely hurt due to internalizing the vague posting. For instance, when we post vaguely, any member reading who's had any contact with the member posting vaguely can feel it's about them, thinking the post about them...internalizing all the upset and anger. I'm certain that this isn't something we hope to see happen.

However it's done, it is simply non-supportive and can help to create anywhere from individual to larger scale upsets within the community...touching many more than we might have intended and interrupting experiences.

When members seen continual upsets, whether or not they're involved, it's interrupting to the experience of support. When we post outside of the guidelines, especially in this area, it almost always affects several to many more than was our intent.

Whether the posting is vague or clear, it almost always is a fuel to the fire, often times affecting the membership on a larger scale.

Guys, please take this in and practice it as a norm. I know it's hard not to seek support when we're angry and/or upset. That's kind of what we do here right? That's true and a good thing EXCEPT when another member, or members, who "lives" in the same community might be hurt, upset, angered, or in some way having their support interrupted or stopped. In other words, it's great and encouraged here to seek support for ourselves, EXCEPTING when it might take away from the support of another.

Please help the mod/admin team work to a wonderful experience for ALL.

Those who might post about another member here, even vaguely, will see those posts removed. Please be clear in your posting if in conflict with another member, because if there's complaint and the post is vague, it will more than likely be removed.

From there, if a member's account sees continual editing by mods or admin, the account could see action (warning of suspension, posting limited, suspension, etc.).

Please keep this in mind as we continue in our posting because, again, posting construed to be about another member, or members here...whether clear or vague...will be removed and the member PM'ed. Continual actions might find a member with admin action.

I appreciate everyone working with the community to make PC a welcoming and supportive place for ALL to find solace. If another member is upsetting you in some respect but are posting/chatting within the guidelines, please place them on ignore. If another member is posting/chatting outside of the guidelines, please report the situation ASAP for it to be addressed, but do not post publicly about the same.

Thank you so much for helping to make PC, and all its members, a great place to be!

If anyone would like to discuss any current issues in and around this subject, or any difficulty, please address it to me or another member of the mod/admin team *in PM*.

Sincerely and with respect,

KD

**edited to correct typo