Hi!
My BF (Jon) has DID and I interact a lot with his alters. They are teaching me a lot. I'm glad that you are co-conscious, and that you two have an understanding about each other. He seems to have more trouble when nobody's communicating or when they're fighting with each other. When there's good communication and cooperation, things can be very good. I don't know what I can say about your situation but can tell you how things are with Jonathan and Jonny.

They tell me that it CAN get very lonely. They both say that I'm the first person who's ever really acknowledged them and treated them like real people. We've even got "date nights" planned so they can spend some time "out" - Jonny wants to do go-cart racing or paintball. Jonathan wants a real date. But that's OK! They are all the man I love, and I enjoy spending time with all of them.

I guess most people just don't understand or recognize... Most people just think Jon's being moody or weird or something. Most people are scared of things they don't understand.

The guys understand that Jon's family is their family - but they don't have the same relationship interactions. They know I'm their GF and they love me, and they know and love his sons. The other people? Accepted and tolerated, if not loved. They feel more kindly toward the family members who are supportive, and they don't care for the ones who are not. But that kinda sounds like any family...And if all else fails, Miss Manners has some wonderful ideas on dealing with human beings.

You may have had a mother. You may have had HER mother, before you split off. That's the way Jonny describes it. That he and Jon were one when they were little until Jon needed to hide and then Jonny split out so Jon could have someplace to hide. I don't understand it all, but maybe those AREN'T all false memories. Maybe they are memories of being together, and after you came, things didn't look or feel the same?

I don't know. I'm on the outside, and i only know what we all talk about. They've even told me that I probably CAN'T understand it all. I just know that they are as real to me as Jon is.
If it helps at all, you can type to us here. I'm sure others will have better understanding and suggestions than I ever could.