I care if you cut. I care if you're hurting too.
(((((((((((((((purplebutterfly)))))))))))))))))
How is your T helping you deal with this? Maybe not enough focus on this issue... or maybe you need another T who has training in this area (I know not all Ts, like people, understand self-injury).
You are not stupid or bad or anything like that. You're hurting and struggling.
Hold off, just an hour at a time if you can do that... I know you can do this.