i pray that the meds aren't just masking my illness.....and i know how you feel about your feelings....i told the psychiatrist that "i've lost my joy" and that is true.......i used to be such a joy=filled person...people would comment on it and that really felt good. when i had the B and B, i was able to quit advertising after two years because people enjoyed it so much that they booked a year in advance.......i'd have to have to rely on that now.....i'd starve to death because no one would want to be around me.......i don't know what the answer is. pat