i understand that conflict myself...but my feeling is that there are simply some conflicts of such a nature that people feel that they need a more private place to talk about them. I certainly wish that I were always that person they feel most comfortable with (my human ego talking), but realistically, I know that just as in day to day life...different people , different problems, require different support sources...and I just tell myself that i'm glad that they have a place to go and a person or persons that they feel comfortable confiding in. That usually makes my "jealousy" or guilty pangs go away......grace