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Silversparrow said:
..I feel like I have to punish myself for emotions...

always had to much built up anger...realsing it is frighting...

Sometimes I think that if I lost the depression, if I lost the anger, If I lost the control I have on my emotions I wouldn't be me anymore..I would be someone else and that is frighting.. who would I be if I wasn't me??

What would it be like to experience emotions right there in the moment..what does that feel like??

I'm also scared that if I go to thearpy that they will see how unstable I really am and that they would hospitalize

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Hi Silver, has therapy been scheduled yet?