Too much @#$% going on. Half the time I'm shaking too much to even type decently, at least I'm not this morning. I've been stuck in bed way too bloody long and the pain from my chest should have died down by now considering I hurt it over a week ago, but I've lost track of time.

Stupid infected #$%^ed up eye that I can't even bloody see out of right know. It scares me that I can't, I had perfect vision, now my eye is a bloody mess, it hurts and I can't see out of it at all. I need to, I can't not see out of my eye, that's screwed up.

And I cut my arm the other night and now it has a giant red patch and red streaks going up it to my hand. My neck and below my shoulders is all swollen now and it bloody hurts.

But I don't go to hospitals, I wait things out, but it all &^%*ing hurts bad and the memories that come back, the things I see, too much is bloody happening.

Sorry to whine. I'm just too tired of this %^$# and inside I'm broken beyond repair and I think I see that now, why bother trying to be strong or trying at all when all I do is waste people's time and drag them down. If you eliminate the person dragging everyone down anyways people should be happier.