Thanks everyone.

No, didn't last without SI, cut my arm pretty bad the night I posted this and now it's infected.

Don't have a T. Told Kate I'd get one but I haven't yet.
I say the pain can't get worse but it seems it always can. I didn't think it could get any worse, now my entire body is killing me. Mental pain, physical pain alike.

Everyone says "go to hospital" but I don't do hospitals, they always keep me there, it's just an infection, just urges, but IDK I feel like such &^%$ today. I feel bad for Kate, she has to sit watching me, but I can't let her come near me because I'm scared I'll infect her. I want to hold her or something

The urges I get to slash my face and this %^&*ed up infected eye are awful, I can't see through the %$#@ing thing, makes me want to hurt bad.