Jinny,

You do NOT sound pathetic. It's painful going through these mean, hurtful experiences with your mom. Feelings Just Are!!! My anger has mostly gone towards my mom, but it sometimes shows up again. When childhood is so painful it continues to affect our adult lives. Like you, I want to get help and get beyond it, so my past will stop invading my present. Hope that makes sense. Our past really is a part of our present, for all of us - but when it is painful and unresolved it takes too much from our present, it robs us in the present by draining our emotional and even physical energy. then if you have people still creating dramas ...OUCH!

Like others have said, Be Gentle To Yourself, you need/deserve that.

Sending you hugs, soft/gentle ones like having angel wings wrap around you! (((((((((hugs)))))))

Leslie and the sadPixie