Strong is everything I not. It's not needing help. It's not having everything wrong with me. It's not being so bloody bothered by my stupid past. It's not being so dumb. Not having all these emotions. Not being sad. Not crying. Not letting myself be beaten by something like this. Being strong is being someone. I'm nothing.

Feel like such $%^& and I want to talk but I'm scared at the same time. I deserve this anyways because I'm weak and bad and stupid and I'm hogging people's time. I deserve the pain I'm in. And it hurts so %#@&#! bad right now I feel like I could just die (can I say that?).