{{{{PurpleButterfly}}}}
I've been where you are right now. So have so many others here at PC and we understand and care about you. That's what this site is about, people going through similar experiences caring about each other, helping each other to make it to better days. Keep posting to let us help you. So many good people have helped me get a bit steadier. I know I'll have a few rough times ahead--my P just confirmed that I'll be going deeper with my therapist. I told my P things I've never told anyone and cried and kicked myself (mentally of course) all through the drive home. And the next day. And the next. Gradually, relief and trust in my P came. I met the therapist the other day that my P recommended. She's alot like him, but he knows that in my case I'll be more comfortable and deep about some issues with woman who understands a woman's pain about some particular issues. He wouldn't know that if I hadn't opened up to him and he is wise. You are very fortunate that your T is so caring to keep you there to be sure you are safe--that s/he understood how deep your pain. I think you are in good hands. Keep us posted. I'll be praying for you.
Warm gentle hugs,
inkspring