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Two women were in the car next to me with their windows also rolled down. One said "Hey, he's cute!" the other said "Yeah, but compared to WHAT?" They both started laughing like crazy. I took my half finished Slurpee and threw it all over them. They sure weren't laughing anymore but they deserved it for being so cruel.

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Isn't throwing a drink on people -- especially people you don't know who are sitting in their own car -- called "assault"?