I can always find a place to stay when I move out, I am just scared and worried about my children. I know that when they grow up, their dad's family will tell them bad and wrong things about me.
I am sure that I won't be able to provide all the luxury of their father and what scares me the most is the unknown future, how will they blame me when they grow up? How harsh is it going to be? Will they hate me?
Especially that their father is trying to improve now and I know quite well that he is acting, that this is not the real him! The real problem is that my heart is shut and I really can't open up to him anymore, today I regret going back to him just because I felt bad when I saw his tears of regret when I left.
I wish I never met him again, I wish I never came back, it is even harder to walk out now... Do i have to give reasons for that if I do?
Do I have to prove anything to my or his family? Can't I just go? I wish I could vanish...