ktgirl, I have heard of therapists trying to extinguish a behavior by refusing to talk about it. Could it be your T is doing that? I personally don't approve of such tactics unless they notify you of what they will doing up front. For example, telling the client at the outset of therapy, "if you choose to bring up self injury, I will not respond or will change the subject, because I believe talking about SI only encourages it," or something like that. If that is the therapeutic strategy your T is taking and hasn't informed you of it, it bears discussion and you will have the opportunity to ask for greater transparency from him RE his therapeutic strategies. If you don't like his strategies and he won't adjust to something more in line with what you want, then you can change therapists.

I'm sorry you are so hurt by this. I can imagine how hard it must be to finally acknowledge you need help, go to a therapist, and have them unwilling to discuss the areas you need help on. That said, a lot of times in therapy there are misunderstandings, and maybe your perception that he is avoiding this topic is not correct. I think he deserves a chance to hear your concerns and address them.

I remember in my therapy, I had this one instance where I told my T he always seemed to ignore a certain topic I brought up and it kind of pissed me off. He told me yes I had brought this topic up obliquely a number of times and he hadn't deliberately tried to not address it, but he said you just have to invite me. He had been getting some vibe from me that I was very tentative or vulnerable around this topic so wanted me to retain control. So now I know that if I want to talk about this, I can, I just have to be more direct about it.